Burke nonprofit helps hundreds escape abuse

Nearly 560 people, including 66 children, sought help from Options during domestic violence crises in Burke County over the past year.

The nonprofit provides emergency shelter, counseling, and assistance navigating the court system for people experiencing domestic violence. Its services are available to men, women, and children, with a 24-hour crisis line for those seeking help.

For Executive Director Kristy Graf, the numbers represent people trying to escape dangerous situations, often while facing difficult decisions about their safety, children, and financial security.

Between Oct. 1, 2025, and Sept. 30, 2026, Options assisted nearly 560 people seeking help. The organization operates a shelter with six bedrooms and provides a crisis line at 828-438-9444.

“We do serve all people,” Graf said. “That’s very important, and people don’t realize, because domestic violence has no boundaries. Anyone can be a victim.”

Options also works to create a safe, supportive environment for those staying at its shelter.

“In the shelter, we try to create a healthy living environment,” said Graf. “We encourage the women to have meals together, to socialize, support each other. We don’t allow violence in our shelter, by word or deed. A lot of moms — this is a big Burke County struggle — you don’t spank in our shelter. There’s no violence. You can’t raise your voice, because you don’t know what’s going to trigger somebody. When you haven’t been raised that way, it’s very bizarre to these women.”

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IN BURKE COUNTY

Statistics from the Burke County Sheriff’s Office show that calls for service involving domestic violence have fluctuated since 2021 and, following a spike in 2022, declined overall.

Of the more than 5,000 domestic violence calls for service between Jan. 1, 2021, and Oct. 9, 2026, 1,367 resulted in reports, including 153 so far this year. Not every call results in a report or an arrest.

The Sheriff’s Office has responded to 1,561 domestic violence protective orders during that same period, including 227 this year.

“When deputies arrive at a domestic call, they are looking for evidence of abuse like cuts or bruises on both parties,” said Sheriff Banks Hinceman. “Sometimes there are signs of assault on both parties on the scene. The deputy must determine which of the parties was the aggressor, if possible. This determination can be difficult at times.”

Victims concerned with getting away from their abusers can go to the Burke County Clerk of Court and petition for a domestic violence protective order, although whether a victim can remain in the home depends on the circumstances.

After a temporary, or ex parte, protective order is issued, a judge hears from both sides and determines whether a longer-term order will go into effect and for how long. Some protective orders can remain in place for up to one year, with the possibility of renewal.

Depending on the circumstances and terms of the order, deputies may assist with removing weapons or allowing a defendant to retrieve necessary belongings.

Options also assists clients navigating the court system and works with law enforcement to help protect those staying at its shelter.

“If there’s a domestic violence protective order (DVO) in place, it would be a felony DVO violation to come onto our property,” said Options Court Advocate Jessica Peedin. “For that matter, if there’s criminal charges out there and they come onto our property, I’d go to the (district attorney) and we get the bond revoked, and they can sit in jail with no bond.”

WHY LEAVING CAN BE DIFFICULT

For many victims, obtaining legal protection is only one part of escaping an abusive relationship.

“The Sheriff’s Office does respond to the same residence for repeated domestic calls,” Hinceman explained. “I think that the victims feel like there is no way out or they can’t make it on their own. The abusive party usually uses controlling behavior and makes the victims feel like they are incapable of making it on their own, especially when there are children involved.”

Graf reiterated this, explaining that victims may make repeated attempts to leave before the separation becomes permanent. She described dramatic swings between abuse and a “honeymoon phase” that can make the relationship feel new again.

“It’s a cycle, and it’s a very vicious cycle,” Graf said, explaining that when the relationship is good, it’s great, but when things start to sour, the situation can spiral quickly. “People are like, ‘Why didn’t she just leave?’ Well, the other statistic is the most dangerous time in a domestic violence relationship is the moment you try to leave. When you leave, they kill you. … That’s why she doesn’t just leave. A lot of people don’t understand that. I have buried clients because they left.”