A cup of coffee, an empty chair: Remembering John Greene

The men had gathered in the cafe at Grace Ridge Retirement Community, as is their custom three or four mornings a week, to grab a light breakfast, drink coffee, swap stories, tell lies.

But underneath the banter and the levity on this slate gray mid-December morning, lurked a blanket of sadness and loss. A key member of their group was missing and will not return.

A man named John Greene.

John Greene, 89, family man, business leader, community stalwart, church servant, and a faithful attendee at those morning sessions at the Grace Ridge cafe, died Thursday, Dec. 11, at Carolinas Medical Center in Charlotte.

John is perhaps best remembered for the decades he spent as president of John Greene Chrysler Dodge Jeep Ram. But the title of “business man,” all those who knew him say, scarcely scratches the surface of what he meant to this community.

“His family mattered more to him than anything in the world,” said his friend, retired attorney Steve Settlemyre.

“It was Thanksgiving and John had reserved a special room here with its own buffet for his family,” Steve recalled. “He was surrounded by his family, children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. I walked in just to say ‘hello’ and he said, ‘I’m the richest person alive.’”

“He wasn’t talking about his checkbook or his IRA,” Steve continued. “He was talking about his family and how much he loved them.”

Sitting next to Steve Settlemyer was another Steve who also counted John as a dear friend — retired jeweler Steve Gregory.

“He was absolutely the perfect Southern gentleman,” Gregory remembered. “He was scrupulously honest and about that honesty John always said, ‘That’s just the way we do business.’”

“He was involved in everything,” Gregory added. “Church, hospital, you name it. He used to joke that ‘All my friends avoid me ’cause I’ve always got my hand out wanting their money for a good cause.’”

Gregory also brought up a little-known fact from John’s past: He performed on the “Ed Sullivan Show” back in the 1950s.

“John attended the Citadel for three semesters before transferring to UNC-Chapel Hill,” Gregory said. “Sullivan had the Citadel Glee Club on his show one Sunday night and John was right there as a member.”

Lamar Smitherman, retired publisher of The News Herald and now Outreach and Industry Relations Coordinator for the N.C. School of Science and Mathematics-Morganton, remembered John as a big supporter of the school.

“Great businessman,” Lamar said. “Very respected in the automotive sales world. Such a professional. A true friend to the School of Science and Math.”

Retired businessman Ronn Hatchel said of John, “He was one helluva guy. He always had something nice to say about everyone. You can’t write enough words to fully capture what a good man he was. He is going to be sorely missed.”

Tom Bland, retired senior minister at Morganton First Baptist, did not count John as one of his flock, but he did count him as a dear friend.

“I always admired and respected his deep commitment to Jesus Christ, which he expressed in multiple ways, though never with a lot of words,” Tom recalled. “John deeply loved his family and simply adored his wife, Jane.”

Tom then ticked off a few of the honors that John had received during his decades of service to the community: Morganton Man of the Year, Order of the Long Leaf Pine, Scouting’s Silver Beaver Award.

Tom also mentioned a particular focus of John during his later years — The History Museum of Burke County.

“John loved the history of this area and had personally lived through much of Burke County’s modern history,” Tom said. “John saw the importance of having and growing a place that could tell Burke County’s story, and he poured his resources and leadership talent into that endeavor as well.”

Retired Superior Court Judge Claude Sitton, now executive director of The History Museum of Burke County, confirmed Tom’s view of John’s importance to the museum.

“He was an anchor for the museum,” said Claude. “He served as chairman and as vice chairman of our board. He was willing to do whatever needed to be done. He was just an amazing man. And we are surely going to miss him.”

A minister who did count John among his flock was the Rev. Dana McKim, who served for a number of years as senior pastor of Morganton’s First United Methodist Church. He now has the same role in Franklin, N.C.

“I was hesitant to call you back,” said Dana, “because I’m afraid I won’t be able to talk about John without breaking down.”

Of his relationship with John, Dana said, “He was my rock. I could always depend on him for solid, strong advice. He was instrumental in helping me adjust to the congregation in Morganton.”

John, Dana went on, had three great passions in his life: his wife Jane, who died in January, his family, and First United Methodist Church.

Dana also noted that John was “phenomenally dedicated to Morganton and to Burke County. Every time we talked, I would learn about another interest of his.”

It is only when Dana talks about his last conversation with John, a phone call made a couple of months ago, that his voice breaks and he has to take a moment to compose himself.

“Even though I was no longer his minister, he would call regularly to check on me,” Dana said. “He was always so kind. Such a fine, fine man.”

This writer knew John for four and a half decades. I first went to see him in the autumn of 1980 when my 1968 Chevy Nova was gasping its last and I was making the kingly sum of 200 bucks a week as a reporter for The News Herald.

I had visions of buying one of the new Chrysler K-Cars. John wisely steered me instead toward a far less expensive hatchback Dodge Colt, a car that served me well for the next 13 years.

Later, when I had been promoted to editor, John would stop by my office at The News Herald, after purchasing an ad for the dealership, and update me on the things he thought were important to the community.

He was always right.

The community will have its opportunity to bid John farewell at his memorial service at 11 a.m. today, Dec. 20, at Morganton’s First United Methodist Church. The family will receive friends after the service.

As befits a man who was both practical and modest, John made it known that he didn’t want flowers at his funeral. Instead, he wants memorial contributions made to the First United Methodist’s Building Preservation Fund or to a charity of your choosing.

And if you’d really like to know more about John and hear some stories that I won’t be retelling here, head over to the Grace Ridge cafe come Monday. You’ll be welcomed with a smile, and you can raise a cup to John’s memory.

(John Greene’s full obituary can be found on Page 7A today.)